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Doc Love Club Show & Article: March 20, 2024

(To those that landed on this sample page, Doc’s coaching is TIMELESS – even though these segments are from 2010 it’s not old – Doc’s wisdom was based on human nature and that does not change – but listen for yourself and decide before you buy)

WE ARE ALREADY WORKING ON NEXT WEEK’S SHOW – 3/27/2024 – EXPECT THIS AND MORE:

*Are Women Really Hard To Read?

*The 5-9 Day Rule Is Tripping Him Up After 3 Months?

*How Do You Keep CHALLENGE Alive In Marriage?

ARTICLE OF THE WEEK: THREE QUESTIONS FROM THREE GUYS

ONE
Hi Doc,

My girlfriend and I go to the beach a lot, and she complains about me staring at other women.

What’s the big deal? Is she a nag?

“Frustrated” Fred

Hi Fred,

You know that I am the only love doctor who comes from a male perspective, but on this one she has you – so set your ego aside (if you can) and take a deep breath. Remember that I am only here on Earth to make sure that Miss Right cannot imagine living without you; so read carefully, and do the right things.

Both partners in a long-term romantic relationship must always have the utmost respect for each other, because the foundation of a lasting romantic relationship is respect. If the man doesn’t give the woman respect, resentment will rear its ugly head, the woman’s Interest Level (her feelings toward him) will slowly diminish, and the man will eventually hear one of the two worst sentences in the whole wide world: “We have to talk,” or, “I need my space.”

To a woman who is in love with you, your staring at another woman in her presence is disrespectful, plus, she thinks you are comparing her to the other woman. So, look at her eyes when you’re with her (except when driving), replace the Playboy on your coffee table with Elle, and lust at other women on the beach only when you are with the boys.

When you stop looking at other women, her Interest Level will rise, because she knows you really do respect her. I have had students tell me that since they have stopped looking at other women, their girlfriends and/or wives actually point out beautiful women for them to look at. You will get an “A” if she gives you this test, because you will respond by saying, “What woman?” and then wink at her like Dennis Quaid would do.

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TWO
Hi Doc,

My wife lost interest in sex after our two children were born. We went to counseling, but it did not work. Ten years without sex was just too much for me to go through, so now we are selling the house and getting a divorce. What’s wrong with her?

“Been There” Ben

Hi Ben,

Your first sentence should have read: “My wife lost interest in me, after our two children were born.” It may come as a surprise to you, but happily married women with children still want to make love to their husbands. In fact, the ones with 90% Interest Level or higher initiate it. The problem is that your wife stopped loving you – not sex.

Ask yourself: did you give her respect, affection, and romance with no strings attached after you married her? Women stay in love with their husbands when their husbands continue to banter, play, and date them after they are married. Men who believe that this romantic play is “all over” after they catch their wives are right – that is why 66% of the people filing for divorce are women, and the divorce rate is 50%.

The only other reason for the change in your wife is that she never loved you to begin with. Did you marry your first date? When you were dating her, were you certain she had intense feelings for you, or did you rationalize the way she treated you? Did you assume your wife had high Interest Level (was deeply in love) in you when you married her? The Reality Factor says that people who assume always get hurt.

As a rule, men project their Interest Level. The fact that you love her does not make her love you back – they are separate issues. She stays in love with you because of your attitude – made up of Confidence, Self-control, and Challenge – not your feelings toward her. Most men believe that women want them to voice their feelings toward them, but the Reality Factor knows that the woman is only interested in her selfish feelings toward the man. Unless she likes you (first), nothing starts – or lasts.

THREE
Hi Doc,

I was seeing a very nice woman for a few weeks and became interested in a closer relationship. I told her how I felt, then left on a two-week vacation. Before I left, I also sent her a letter expressing my feelings. The day I returned home, I found a message from her on my voicemail that said, “I hope you had a safe trip. Thanks for the letter and please do not call me anymore.” I believe ending a relationship should be done face to face or at least in a conversation on the phone. Am I being overly sensitive?

“Distraught” Dennis

Hi Dennis,

I’m glad she is “a very nice woman,” but what does that have to do with her Interest Level (her percentage of love toward you)? If she had high Interest Level, she would have told you she wanted a closer relationship with you. Plus, you would not have needed to bring up this subject again with a written communiqué – is she hard of hearing? Remember that it is always better if the woman thinks that pursuing a long-term relationship is her idea.

As for her abrupt honesty on the voicemail: look at all the time and money she saved you – a user would have kept dating you. Remember that there is no proper way to end a relationship. The dumpee always gets hurt more. In this case, she either never cared for you going in, or if she did, you did not display the male strength qualities of Confidence, Self-Control, and the most important: being a Challenge.

You are not overly sensitive – you just had her mixed up with someone who liked you. Next time, forget your Interest Level (your feelings), and look only for her Interest Level in you via her positive actions toward you. To be a Challenge, she has to wonder where she stands. Since men do the picking, but women do the choosing, let the woman chase you.

NEXT UP…WEDNESDAY, 3/27: DO SOME WOMEN WITH LOW INTEREST LEVEL MISLEAD?

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